


Hypnotic Charms

by vedinamel



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Carnival, F/F, Humanstuck, Hypnotism, Mindfang is a charlatan, karma houdini
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-02
Updated: 2016-02-02
Packaged: 2018-05-17 18:00:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,532
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5880391
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/vedinamel/pseuds/vedinamel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Moving to a new city has it's fair share of problems, loneliness is one of them. However, Dolorosa finds it can be aggravating to get too close too fast to the first person who catches your eye.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Hypnotic Charms

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first entry for the Femslash Big Bang of 2016, for the monthly challenge of February. The prompt for this month is "Meet Cute."

 The first days after moving to a new city can be pretty awkward. The air somehow feels strange, the new bedroom has an alien feel to it, and the awakening mind may entertain ideas of going back to sleep in hopes that the next time it awakens it will be back in a familiar place.

 Acceptance of her decisions and new surroundings slowly came back as she forced her body to start the morning ritual anew. Sure it felt strange going into that new bathroom, looking at herself in that new mirror with that new wall behind her, but she knew she’d grow used to it eventually.

  Turning on the TV made her new home seem more comfortable. All those familiar voices and faces on the screen while she made breakfast created a thin illusion of not being lonely.  The sounds of hurried high heels coming from the apartment above were surprisingly welcoming. Part of Dolorosa earned to be so hurried to go someplace this early, but classes were still relatively far away. There was still some time left before she’d have to meet her new students at her new job.

 When the morning TV shows reached the depressingly boring part of their schedules, she decided she had all the time in the world to get used to her new home, now would be a good time to go out and explore the strange new world she had placed herself into.

  The noisy and energetic city of Prospit greeted her with car horns of impatient and reckless drivers; hurried people bumping into her; the occasional guitar player at the corner of a street; and the sound of cars crashing, courtesy of the already mentioned impatient and reckless drivers.

 Dolorosa kept her eyes peeled, paying attention to the names of streets and memorizing the names of places to be used as points of reference, building a map of the city in her head. A couple of hours in and she had already worked the fastest route from her apartment to her new place of work. Prospit High had nice and welcoming facilities, but Dolorosa found that they could have been a little more creative with the name.

 Continuing her exploration of the city, our brave adventurer arrived at the entrance of a carnival. This could prove amusing for a couple of hours, interesting even. An environment of fun and entertainment would be the perfect place to make new acquaintances, a chance to be rid of the loneliness that befalls new arrivals.

 She had never seen a carnival so packed with people, and it wasn’t even past lunch time yet. Prospitian habits, she supposed. She bought herself cotton candy; dropped a smug looking man into a barrel of water with a baseball; and got herself a ridiculously oversized teddy bear after failing to knock down a few tin bottles with the same method, and correctly deducing that the bottles were glued to each other and the table. Though, the bear was taken back after she informed other people of the dishonesty.

 “Come one, come all! No need to be shy, ladies and gentlemen. Come witness the astounding talents of Madam Mindfang!”

 Well, since she asked so nicely.

 Dolorosa joined the crowd that gathered in front of the small and neatly decorated stage. The woman enthusiastically called for the people at the carnival, alluding to the fantastic things she was about to show them, but still being rather vague about them. She really liked the sound of her own voice, and really did seem convinced she was capable of wondrous things. Whatever her attraction was about, Dolorosa could tell the woman loved herself and what she did, and at the end of the day that’s what really matters.

 “Prepare to be amazed, as the Marvelous Madam Mindfang demonstrates powers beyond human comprehension! Your entire world view will be shattered as Madam Mindfang warps your perceptions of reality itself!”

  The woman decorated her words with broad and exaggerated hand gestures. It was rather silly and corny, but Dolorosa couldn’t help but find all that somewhat endearing. She caught herself hoping that Madam Mindfang could really pull off…whatever she was trying to sell with her prolonged opening monologue. She’d hate to see the entertainer hurt if people were to not like her show.

 “You there! Unsuspecting stranger that I had never seen before in my life, come here!”

  She pointed at a tall, serious man. His face was marked by two diagonal scars that went from the left side of his jaw to the right side of his forehead. His purple shirt had its sleeves rolled back in the obvious intention of showing off his biceps.

 “Who? Me?” The man pointed at himself, speaking in a monotone voice. His movements were stiff. “I’m sorry, ma’am.  I’m just a simple man from this city. I am not qualified to be part of your amazing show. Please, pick someone else.”

 “Nonsense, my dear stranger. Madam Mindfang’s gifts are to be shared with the common folk. Come to the stage and seize the opportunity of being a vessel for Madam Mindfang’s stupendous powers!”

 People in the crowd rolled their eyes and sighed. Dolorosa felt a bit sad that people were already getting disinterested in the show. Sure, trying to pass your assistant for a member of the audience was the oldest trick in the book, but that didn’t mean the show wouldn’t be fun. She really thought people should give the beautiful woman a chance.

 Not that her being beautiful had anything to do with it, of course. Come on, Dolorosa isn’t that easily manipulated by another woman, of course not.

 The tall scar faced man, with his stiff movements, climbed onto the stage and sat on a chair, as Madam Mindfang instructed him to.

  “Now look into my eyes, complete stranger” Madam Mindfang instructed him further. “You are feeling sleepy, veeeeeeeery sleepy. You’ll fall into deep slumber, but remain aware of my voice and my commands.”

 The man with the scars closed his eyes and tilted his head to the side, very obviously faking his snoring.

 “Now at the count of three, you’ll wake up and believe you are…a chicken! One, two, three!”

 The scar faced assistant jumped off the chair, his arms bent with the back of his hands on his hips to imitate the wings of the flightless dinner bird. He bobbed his head and made chicken noises with the same monotone voice as before. The crowd booed and a couple of empty soda cans were thrown at them. Dolorosa, feeling bad for the beautiful entertainer, clapped her hands, but it wasn’t audible amongst all the booing. She stood at the tip of her toes in hopes that she would see Dolorosa, maybe if she thought that at least one person had fun she wouldn’t feel bad.

 “Thank you, ladies and gentlemen. You’re very kind, thank you. Thank you.” Madam Mindfang took a bow and winked while saying the last thanks. Dolorosa thought for a moment that her eyes must be getting bad, because it looked like the beautiful entertainer winked at her.

 “Oh come on!” shouted a man in the middle of the crowd. “That’s the guy from the shooting alley! You went and teamed up with the most easily recognizable person, just how lazy are you, lady?!”

 “What is that I hear? You people want another demonstration of my amazing hypnotism talents? Well, if you insist.”  Madam Mindfang began waving her hands in front of the complete stranger assistant.  “On the count of three, you’ll believe to be…a raging bull! One, two, three!”

 The assistant moved his hands to the sides of his head, sticking out his index fingers to imitate the hons of a bull. He buffed and jumped off the stage, charging at the crowd, going after the man who spoke up. The man ran, demanding the assistant to stop as he headbutted the man at his torso, making sure the man wouldn’t stray too far from the crowd.

 Dolorosa smiled as the crowd started laughing. Not that she enjoyed the man being the target of ridicule, but she was happy that the beautiful woman managed to make people laugh. Hopefully the man will find in his heart the kindness to forgive her.

 “Fret not, ladies and gentlemen. The raging bull is not as dangerous as it believes itself to be. I shall banish it to the depths of this stranger’s subconscious so that he can have control of his own mind and body again. Excuse me, excuse me, excuse me…”

  Madam Mindfang hopped off the small stage and made her way through the crowd. She passed by Dolorosa, who was at the end of the crowd, and the vacationing teacher felt…something. It was a light, almost imperceptible touch. It was almost as if…no. No, no, no. That beautiful and endearing carnival entertainer wouldn’t…

 Dolorosa put a hand in her pocket. All the spare money she had there was gone! Why, that beautiful and endearing daughter of a…

 “Now at the count of three, you’ll be back to be the person you were before! One, two, three!”

 The scar faced man spun on his heels and went back to his stiff movements.

 “Oh my god.” He said, as monotone as ever. “I dreamed I was a chicken that turned into a raging bull.”

 The crowd laughed. There were a few declarations of “you suck” from the mass of people, but most of the audience still seemed to have enjoyed the laughably bad show. The _intentionally_ laughably bad show. Dolorosa crossed her arms and frowned, waiting for the beautiful charlatan to turn in her direction and see the disapproval in her face, but the woman didn’t seem to have noticed her.

 “Thank you, ladies and gentlemen. You were a wonderful audience. I’ll be here all week!”

 The crowd dispersed, but Dolorosa remained still, patiently waiting the beautiful charlatan to stumble upon her disapproval, apologize, and then give back her money and the money of everybody she tricked. The woman didn’t look at her direction. She simply walked away.

 Dolorosa followed the “Marvelous Madam Mindfang” to her trailer. Deceptive people such as she relied on remaining undetected, a slippery and cowardly type of people. Surely if someone confronted her, she would crumble at the weight of her own misdeeds and be reasoned into repairing the damage. She’s an adult after all; she must be easier to reason with than the misbehaving teens Dolorosa usually is in charge of educating.

  Dolorosa knocked on her door once, twice, three times before she finally opened it.

  “What is it?!” Demanded Mindfang.

  “I want my money back.” Dolorosa said in the same tone she used with her students.

 “Sorry babe, no refunds.” She closed the door, only to reopen it a second later. “Besides, the show was free.”

 Dolorosa managed to get one leg inside the trailer before Mindfang could close the door completely again. She had to use both hands to push the door open. Mindfang stumbled back, but managed to look somewhat gracious as she fell backwards onto the chair behind her, crossing her legs as if she had intended in sitting down.

 “By all means, come in. It is not often that a fan musters enough courage to approach me and ask for an autograph. It’ll be five boondollars. Make it ten if you want a lipstick mark with it.” She looked Dolorosa up and down, a smirk forming in her lips. “For you, as a special offer, for fifteen I’ll let you choose where I plant it.”

 Dolorosa blushed, but she wouldn’t let fifth rate flirting deviate her from her path.

  “You stole money from me, and I want it back. And I also want you to give back the money of everybody you may have robbed during your ruse of a show.”

 “My, aren’t you bold?” Mindfang stood up. Dolorosa hadn’t noticed just how tall the woman was, standing a head taller than her. “Coming into my home, making these wild accusations against my honored person. Have you any proof?”

 “Well, I…I figured out your scheme! You and your partner stage a bad hypnosis show, he gets off the stage and you pickpocket the audience as you make your way through them to get to him.”

 “That’s a very cute story you got there, my dear.” Mindfang sat back on her chair, intentionally this time. “But that’s all it is, a story. You have no proof. Most likely you misplaced your money somewhere else and now you’re accusing a poor, starving carnival performer for your mistake.”

 “I know it was you! I felt you touching me right before I noticed my pocket was empty!”

 “Darling, if I had put my hands on you I wouldn’t have let go.”

“I know what you’re doing,” Dolorosa said as she blushed furiously. “You’re trying to distract me, misdirect me, but that’s not gonna-“

 Mindfang stood up once more, advancing at Dolorosa, making her back away until she reached the wall. Mindfang placed an arm on the way to block her way to the door, getting too close for comfort.

 “I’m afraid whatever fantasy you may have had about me during my show isn’t enough to prove I stole anything from anyone. Unless, of course, you are accusing me of stealing your heart.”

 Dolorosa had a million comebacks rolling in her head, but no words came out when she opened her mouth. This “Madam Mindfang”, or whatever her real name was, was a smug petty thief…but she was one _gorgeous_ smug petty thief. With her other hand, Mindfang held Dolorosa’s chin as she got closer. They closed their eyes and Dolorosa could feel Mindfang’s breathing, their lips almost touching…

 “Big trouble!”

The man with the scars slammed the door open, then he slammed it back shut. He was breathing heavily and his shirt was stained with sweat. He looked to his side and saw that Mindfang already had company.

 “Not now, Dualscar!” Mindfang roared at him.

 “Seriously? At a time like this? Woman, you need some damn self-control. Ever heard of that?”

 “What’s wrong now, Dualscar?” Mindfang inquired.

 “His name is Dualscar?” Dolorosa asked, visibly amused.

  “We gotta grab everything we can and get the hell out of here.”  He said, wasting no time to actually grab everything he could carry that was in front of him.

 “Will you calm down and just tell me in what trouble you got us into this time?” Mindfang persisted.

 “His name is actually Dualscar? His mom thought of that? That’s on his birth certificate?” In all her years as a teacher, Dolorosa had seen some colorful names, but never something as appropriate to the person as this.

  “The people you pickpocketed during the show, they wised up and they are coming here!”

 “Ah-hah! So you did steal from us!” Dolorosa declared triumphant.

 “Yeah, you got me. Gold star, congratulations, here’s the key to the city.” Mindfang looked out the window and closed the tiny curtain. “Crap. One of the things I hate the most in this world: averagely clever people. Why are there so many of those here? Must be something in the water.”

 “Now you have no choice, you’ll give back everything you stole!” Dolorosa declared.

 “Sure thing, darling. Do you want me to heal the sick and end world hunger before or after that?”

 Suddenly there was banging on the walls from outside, shouting, and a big impact made the trailer shake. Everything that wasn’t bolted to the floor feel as the angry mob outside kept shaking the trailer.

 “They are trying to turn the trailer over!” Dualscar observed with barely contained fear.

 “All this for pocket change and a couple of wallets? What’s wrong with these people?!” Said Mindfang.

 “Just give them their money back!” Dolorosa angrily suggested.

 “Oh my god, you are a broken record, aren’t you, my sweet?”  Mindfang looked at Dualscar. “Alright Dualscar, this is your time to shine. Go out there and take the blame for everything!”

 “WHAT?! So I’m to get beaten while you and your new girlfriend escape? Not a chance!”

 “Look into my eyes, Dualscar!”

 “This isn’t time for rehearsal!”

 “ ** _Look into my eyes, Dualscar_** _!_ ” Mindfang grabbed Dualscar’s face, holding his head in place so he would stare into her eyes as told to do. “ ** _You’ll go out there and take the blame for everything._ ”**

 “I…will go out there…” Dualscar repeated. “And take the blame…for everything.”

 Dualscar stood up, walked out of the trailer and shut the door behind him as he exited.  The trailer stopped shaking, but the shouting didn’t stop.

 “What did you…how did you…” Dolorosa looked at the carnival entertainer with both curiosity and a bit of fear.

 “Be amazed by the Marvelous Madam Mindfang.” Mindfang said, somehow managing to sound both serious and sarcastic. “Now for my next trick: my new assistant and I will disappear. Follow me!” Mindfang stood up and jumped out of the window opposite to where the angry mob was.

 “Wait, what? New assistant?” Dolorosa got up looking at Mindfang running away from the window. “I’m not a criminal! Wait, you still need to give the money back!”

 Dolorosa sighed relieved when she got to her new apartment. She was still a bit shaken for almost being brutalized by an angry mob for being at the wrong place at the wrong time, only one of the culprits was caught, and she lost track of the one with the stolen money. But at least she was back at her home and now she could relax.

 A hand grabbed the door handle before she could do it herself and opened the door for her.

  “So this is your place? Not what I was expecting, but it’ll do.”

 Dolorosa froze in place as Mindfang appeared out of nowhere and entered her apartment.

 “It’s nice. Better than what I had before, at least. Where is the bedroom?...Seriously, that’s our bed? Eh, it’ll do, you’re lucky I like to spoon. You’re coming or what?”

 “What are you doing here?!” the distressed teacher asked.

 “Well, when I was running for my life I figured: hey, I have no other place to go. But then I figured you had a place to go, so I just followed you here.  I’m smart like that. Aaaaaaaand here’s my half of the rent.”

 “How do you know how much my rent is?”

 “Oh, I was right behind you when we got here; you’re not as perceptive as you made yourself out to be.  I spotted the landlord and informed him that I’m your new roommate, but you forgot to tell me who much the rent was, so he told me. Very trusting guy, that one. Egbert, was it?”

 “Fantastic, but you can’t live here. Besides, that’s crime money, I can’t live in an apartment payed with crime money!”

 “Too late,” said Mindfang from the bathroom. “I’m already putting my toothbrush right heeeeeeeere next to yours, now it’s official.”

 “You can’t just come here and-“

 Mindfang held up a few boondollar bills, the exact amount of money she had taken from Dolorosa.

 “What I took from you, as a peace offering.”

 “Your peace offering is the thing you took from me? You see nothing wrong with that?”

 “What is it with you and “right” and “wrong”? Darling, the world isn’t black and white, everything is a grey area.”

 “No, it isn’t.”

 “Here,” she placed the money on Dolorosa’s hand and pulled her by the shoulders, planting a kiss on her cheek. “Start saving so we can get a bigger bed. Unless you really do want to spoon every night, my dear…sorry, with my old friend panicking and the vigilante mob, I forgot to ask your name.”

  “Dolorosa…and you are…?”

 “Mindfang. You really aren’t as perceptive as you pretended to be, I said my name a dozen times.”

 “You mean your name really is Mindfang?” she snickered.

 “Hey, you have no right to laugh at my name, Dooooloooorosa.”

  Before Dolorosa could continue to protest the invasion of her new home, Mindfang began taking her shirt off, her mouth denying letting out any coherent words as her eyes insisted in fixating on Mindfang’s six pack. Apparently this day was still full of surprises.

 “I’m going to take a shower now, if you don’t mind. I had a surprisingly eventful morning. What are we having for lunch?” Mindfang looked at Dolorosa when she didn’t hear a reply and smirked as she made her way to the bathroom. “A bit soon to be speechless, don’t you think, darling? You haven’t seen anything yet.”

 Dolorosa regained control of her functions after Mindfang closed the bathroom door. It really had been an eventful morning. And to think that just a few hours ago she was battling loneliness. Although now that the loneliness problem had been resolved, Dolorosa found herself with a much bigger problem.

 “Hey, you’re going to compensate the people you stole from, right? You’re going to do community service, right? You’re going to get an honest job, right?!”

 “Can’t hear you, my darling. I’m showering.”

 


End file.
